The Power of a GOOD Support Circle and Why You Need One For Success
Did you know that 55% of workers feel like they're going at it alone?
A survey by Glassdoor in 2019 found that as many as 55% of employees feel like they're working in isolation, without a support system or network. Now, that is an interesting fact in a world where we are bombarded by information, pressured to make connections, stay up to date with our social media and focus on networking. How is it that more than half of the workforce feels they are on their own, at one time or another?
And keep in mind, this survey was conducted in 2019. One can only assume that after the Covid-19 pandemic, which standardized ideas like remote work, virtual meetings and home office, it has distanced us from having a support system even more.
We can say with confidence that we have a loneliness epidemic, and this reflects on the workers in today’s world as well. Interestingly enough, among millenials who are employed 75% of them declared on a LinkedIn poll that having a support circle is crucial for their career success.
The question here is not just WHAT a support circle is, but what is a GOOD support circle. A support circle can go both ways and you need to know the power of a good support circle and why you need one to achieve success. Read on to find out how to create a GOOD support circle that will make you thrive!
The Good, Bad and The Reality
You may not be fully aware of it, but your support circle has an influence on you and your career. Absence of a support circle provokes feelings of detachment, osilation, loneliness and is proven to make advancing in work and life slower, if not even harder.
A good support circle will make you excel and shine while a bad support circle will bring you down. Let’s go over some facts of what influence support circles have on you as an individual.
What a good support circle provides you:
Increased job satisfaction, providing emotional support, guidance, and encouragement, leading to higher job satisfaction and engagement.
Improved mental health, help in coping with stress, anxiety, and depression by providing a listening ear, validation, and constructive feedback.
Enhanced skills and knowledge, offering valuable advice, mentorship, and collaboration opportunities, helping you grow professionally and personally.
Increased confidence, providing a sense of belonging, boosting self-esteem, and giving you the courage to take calculated risks.
Better work-life balance with prioritizing well-being, setting boundaries, and maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
What a bad support circle gives you:
Toxic behavior, leading to bringing you down, gossiping, backstabbing, or constant criticism.
Negative influence from surrounding oneself with negative people, leading to a decrease in motivation, self-doubt, and poor decision-making.
Lack of growth opportunities, as well as a lack of opportunities for learning, advancing, or skill-building.
Feeling of isolation as being part of a bad support circle can leave you feeling isolated and disconnected from others who might offer more positive influence and encouragement
Burnout and exhaustion due to constant negativity, drama, or competition.
What absence of a support circle entails:
Increased feelings of loneliness and isolation, feeling disconnected from others and lost or stuck in life and work.
Poor mental health with an increase in stress, anxiety, and depression, as you may not have a trusted confidant or emotional support system.
Limited growth and resource opportunities, due to limited guidance, networking opportunities, hindering your professional growth.
Increased self-doubt and uncertainty: Without a support circle, individuals may feel uncertain about their decisions or lack confidence in their abilities, leading to self-doubt and uncertainty.
Difficulty with work-life balance, feeling lost and unable to find a balance between what is a priority and drawing boundaries
Being in an environment that is supportive, encouraging, positive and kind can make all the difference for your mental health, job satisfaction, work-life balance and self-worth.
“Make sure everybody in your “Boat” is rowing and not drilling holes when you’re not looking. Know your circle.”
What Makes a Good Support Circle
You really need to take an honest and deep look into your own life to start building a good support circle. Making a good support circle is no easy task, but it is absolutely 100% worth it. There are several aspects you need to look at if you want to create an environment for yourself that will foster positivity and growth.
Your physical surrounding. One thing I have learned the hard way, is that where you live is a base for creating a good support circle. Whether you live in a village or city, what is the profile of your community, who lives close to you, and what kind of amenities you have on hand can all play a role in whether you feel supported. Let’s put it this way, if you are living on your own, in suburbs where mostly families live, far from friends and family - this may not be the best base for creating a good support circle.
Your friends and family. Friends are family you choose and family, well, you can’t really choose. Both (or at least some of them) are usually close to us and therefore have a big part in our support circle. Especially for those living with friends and/or family, having these people in your immediate surrounding can make or break the quality of your support circle.
Your co-workers and work place. We spend a hefty chunk of our day working, so co-workers, partners, managers all have an impact on how supported and motivate we feel. If you think about an average work day of 8h, that is one third of your day spent in this environment! It’s no wonder it has a substantial part in your support circle.
Hobby and interest groups. How we spend our time outside of work, family and life obligations in general is entirely up to us. Your hobby and interest groups can be a silent motivator or a silent motivation killer.
Social media. Something constantly overlooked when talking about a support circle! What pops up in your feed and who you follow is also a subconscious part of your support circle. Doom scrolling and following the wrong people can have a negative impact on your confidence, motivation and performance, as can spending too much time in the virtual world, instead of tackling reality.
How many of these aspects have you thought of before? How many of them would you rate as a 10/10? And how many would you rate as less than that?
Once you divide your support circle into these areas, it becomes a lot clearer which areas need improvement, doesn’t it? The most important thing is to be honest, because without the ability to honestly look at your surroundings and influences, you won’t be able to make the necessary changes. Changes are usually scary for people, as is honestly admitig that something may not be serving you.
So what then?
How to Let Go of a Support Circle That Doesn’t Serve You and Create One That Does
One of the hardest things to do is to look at what serves you, look at what doesn’t, admit it to yourself and then change it or even remove it from your life. Humans are creatures of habit. It comes as no surprise we like to cling to old patterns, even when they may not serve us any more. What mustn’t be forgotten is that we are also capable of growth and that something that served us before, may not serve us anymore. Let’s put it this way, sometimes, you just have to stirr the pot.
How do you approach the various aspects of a support circle so that you can break from restricting factors and yet create new
Tweak your physical surrounding. There is no one size fits all when it comes to your physical surrounding. Depending on what is important to you, you may want to change your environment. Assess how close are you to the people that make you inspired, what are the community values and do they align with yours and what is the profile of the people where you live. Even if you may have to move, have the courage to take that step, this is your physical base after all and it matters.
Drawing boundaries with friends and family. It is most likely you have some friends and family who have opinions and influences on you - in fact, everyone does! Are their values in line with your goals, desires and wishes? One of the hardest things I have had my clients do (and I had to do myself multiple times) is either draw boundaries, learn how to say no or even remove people who do not resonate on the same level any more. While being hard, you have to view family and friends as your emotional base. They are people you lean on when it’s the hardest. This area of your support circle needs to be 100% bullet proof.
Re-evaluating your workplace. You may love your job, but how is the environment? Do you always have that one colleague that winds up everyone? Or is there a competitive atmosphere where backstabbing is common place? None of these are good indicators. You want your workplace to be a safe place to expand your skills, entrust in mentors and advance in your position. Quitting is not always the answer, especially if you are satisfied with your job and conditions, but drawing boundaries, calling out on the issues and tackling inappropriate behavior is the answer. Silence will get you nowhere in this case.
Taking up new hobbies and interests. A great way to increase chances to expand your support system is taking up new hobbies, changing clubs and discovering new interests. Seek out people and be open to a possibility of a new friendship, as well as a new setting that will become a new area of your support circle.
Cleaning up social media and limiting screen time. People so often underestimate the power of social media. Think about what are you feeding your mind when you scroll before bedtime. Are you empowering yourself? Or are you aimlessly scrolling, comparing yourself to others? Whatever the case, we need social media to network and stay in touch with loved ones, but limiting screen time can have a positive influence on your mindset and encourage you to devote more time to your actual life goals.
By taking these concrete steps you are already well on your way to create a powerful, solid, good support system that will be there for you in times of need, in times of growth and in times of crisis.
“Keep your circle small with positive-minded individuals who only come to grow with you, and not to take advantage of you.”
Breaking the Cycle TODAY
Creating a good support circle is imperative for success today. Having an environment of like-minded individuals, who believe in your potential, provide guidance, and offer emotional support can make all the difference in your career journey.
A good support circle can lead to increased job satisfaction, improved mental health, enhanced skills and knowledge, increased confidence, and a better work-life balance.
Start today by evaluating your goals and values, assesing the various areas of a support circle, making adjustments and changes and then nurturing the circle you have created. I consider it a form of self-care to take care of yourself, your physical and emotional well-being by practicing self-compassion, setting boundaries, and engaging in your support circle which is a platform for growth.
Remember, building a support circle takes time and effort. It's not something that happens overnight. But by taking the small steps, you'll be well on your way to creating a network that will support you every step of the way. Don't underestimate the power of a good support circle. It's a game-changer for career success – and it's worth investing in.
Take action today and start building your own support circle. Your career (and well-being) will thank you later!
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